let's talk about lunch, baby. let's talk about you and me.

owl moon bento. i entered this lunch into a contest to win a new stainless steel planetbox lunch box yesterday. sadly, i didn't win, but i did have quite a few people on the 100 DAYS OF REAL FOOD blog and facebook page ask lots of questions about this lunch, so i thought i'd answer them all in one place.

1. how do you get everything to stay in place?

easy! i just fold a cloth napkin right over the top of the owl sandwich press the lid on. my daughter rides her bike to school (a little over 2 miles with her lunch bouncing around in her backpack and turned sideways) and then her lunch gets thrown in a giant bin with all her classmates. after quite a bit of jostling and shaking, she reported back to me that it looked exactly the same when she opened it up on the lunch table. good to know! another trick i sometimes pull out of my lunch-making hat is to use cream cheese or peanut butter as glue. 

2. the feathers? are those almonds? how do they stay in place? what about nut allergies!?

yes. i used sliced almonds. it took about 33 seconds to place them all on the bread. about one second per almond slice. whew! if you have a nut-free school, i think it'd be cute to use some fruit leather cut in the shape of wings. at our school, there is a table in the lunchroom designated as the nut-free zone.

3. how much time did this take?

less than 3 minutes. it took about the same amount of time it would have if i was making most of the other lunches in the contest and here's why: packing the lunches is one of the jobs i give my kids. (i have four minions to do my bidding). 

how i did it:

1. placed leftover kale salad and blueberries into the lunch boxes

2. sliced the radishes.

3. assembled the sandwich, using leftover herbed turkey from the night before and cut it with a round cookie cutter (cutting the sandwich takes less than 5 seconds and i save the bread scraps to make croutons for chef salad, which i burned tonight and then threw in the garbage).

4. MEANWHILE (and here's the secret to my success) my daughter cut the radishes into stars and used different sizes of round cookie cutters to make the moon and eyes.

5. i was going to use sliced olives for the pupils but realized we were out so i cut a sheet of nori seaweed with scissors.

6. i didn't want to do the almond feathers, but she really wanted to, so i let her lay them onto the sandwich while i filled up 4 water bottles.

honestly it took about 10 times MORE time to shoot the picture, upload it, edit it and post it to the contest than it did to make the lunch.

4. wow. you must have a lot of fancy gadgets to put this lunch together.

they are fancy! and you can be fancy too! i got the lunch box at target. it's ziploc brand, called the divided rectangle, and it's sold in pairs for about $3. the cheese was cut using a set of circle cutters i bought on amazon. and the stars were cut with a play-do cutter that came in a set i got about 9 years ago when my oldest daughter still played with play-do. 

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and that wraps up our FAQ on the owl moon bento. but you know me. there's a few more things we should discuss. but i'll kindly pepper the rest of my post with pictures of past lunches, in the hopes that it will inspire you and distract you from the ranty tone of the rest of this post.

i occasionally post pictures on facebook and instagram of the lunches i make. and i haven't ever said anything, but i get REALLY BOTHERED by some of the comments.

this lunch looks great, but what does it look like by lunch time?

so glad you asked. i'll answer that by asking a question: you know i'm making these lunches to be eaten, right? ALL THE LUNCHES ARE DESTROYED BY THE TIME LUNCH IS OVER ANYWAY. regardless, i am pretty good at packing things tightly so that they are still presentable at lunch time any way.

but this brings up a second issue. i'd make lunches like these anyway even if they were destroyed by lunch time, because for me, i find joy in the process of creation. packing lunches used to be something i hated like i hate laundry and scrubbing toilets. now it's one of my favorite parts of the day. and it's even better because i get to share that time with my kids and they're part of the process as well.

which brings me to my third issue with this comment. i don't think the value of any type of art diminishes based on the permanence of the artwork. in other words, it's the process of creation that gives art value, not how long the art lasts. i have a favorite quote by picasso: "art washes from the soul the dust of every day life." for me, i find an incredible amount of joy working with my kids in the morning and making something beautiful and healthy. i'm nourishing bodies and souls.

i don't have time to do decorative/elaborate lunches like that.

oh really? last time i checked, we all lived on the same planet, which means we all have 24 hours in a day. what i hear when someone makes a comment like that is really: "you should have better/more important things to do with your time like i do." what we do with our time is a CHOICE. we're not victims, locked into a set schedule everyday. and i like to remember that saying "yes" to one thing means saying "no" to something else. maybe i get up earlier than you. maybe i watch less tv than you. maybe my house is messier than yours. maybe my clothes are more wrinkled than yours because i let them sit in the dryer for 5 days. maybe i'm smellier because i skipped showering to have time to make these lunches. i am busy all day long just like most of you. i have four busy kids. i write novels. i design. i make 3 meals a day for 6 people. i volunteer at my church. i wash about 17 loads of laundry a week. i make my own bread and yogurt. i coach my son's soccer team. i take meals to my friends when they're sick. we all have to prioritize based on what we think is most important. for me, creating is important so i prioritize it. even if i'm doing it with school lunches. and i think it's fine if that's not one of your things, too. i'm sure you're saying yes to something really valuable when you say no to spending time making a lunch like mine.

you're so lucky that your kids aren't picky

i don't think i'm lucky so much as persistent and vigilant. i'm the parent. i'm the lioness at the gate. i buy the food in the house. if the kids haven't finished something in their lunch, they eat it for a snack when they get home. hungry kids just might surprise you with what they'll eat. 

be happy. a good note to end on.

happening this week

oh, hi! just a few quick things.

1. last week of summer here. the kids all go back to school next week. i would be more sad about this if i'd had even one writing session go for more than five minutes this entire summer without being interrupted by my dear, sweet, needy children. [i realize this makes me sound like a heartless, ungrateful, selfish mother. i'm not. we've had a summer full of fun family time. it's been wonderful. but. i have a rule to always have an open line of communication with my kids, even when i'm writing. they know they can always get a hold of me if they need something. which they take full advantage of, thus the interruptions.]

i'm so excited for them to be involved in good things at school so i can sink my head deeper into my novel. so excited.



2. it's the little guy's birthday this week. if you live in northern utah, you've seen the swampy, smoky air we've been breathing. lucas has had some breathing trouble because of it and because of me not being vigilant enough to stop his dairy-sneaking ways.

i was up all night with him last week, doing breathing treatments, rubbing essential oils on his chest, and trying to keep him calm. it worked, his wheezing eased a little after about 5 hours of ministering to him, and finally, in the wee hours of the morning he dozed off. i crawled into my own bed, exhausted, only to hear him yell down the hall, "MOM HURRY! I'M DYING!" i rushed in, asking what was wrong. "I'm starving to death," he said.

yeah. happy birthday little guy! he requested a fun day at the waterpark, crepes for breakfast, waffles for lunch, and pancakes for dinner. can you sense a theme?



3. in addition to the birthday this week, it's also my anniversary [15 years!]. and we have two soccer tournaments going on. so naturally, i decided this would be a great time to start a yeast cleanse, to see if i can't get rid of my horrible, horrible allergies/hay fever that have persisted for almost a full year now, only getting worse and worse. i'll let you know how it goes.



4. and just a quick writing update. [i feel a little silly always posting these, since i'm so far away from being a "real", published author, but i keep doing it anyway. my way of faking it until i make it, i guess.] i am loving my story now. i wish i could ignore all my other responsibilities and just finish writing it, but i am a wife and a mother and a volunteer at my church, all things that i choose to take precedence over writing some of the time.

anyway, i'd love some first draft beta readers in about 4 or so weeks when i get to the end. let me know if you're willing to read it and have the time to offer constructive criticisms. just a caveat: it's probably pg-13 in content for swearing and drug-use, and it has some dark, intense themes.



5. what about you lovelies? anything great happening this week?

my family's musical story in a venn diagram

when i lived at home, my mother would, on occasion, sneak into my room and...uh..."edit" my collection of music cassettes if she saw anything she judged to be inappropriate. meanwhile, she offended my teenage music sensibilities by listening to musicals, pretty much exlusively. she was particularly fond of michael ballam and i can sing from memory any song he ever sang on broadway.

i close my eyes, drew back the curtain
to see for certain, what I thought I knew
far far away, someone was weeping
but the world was sleeping
any dream will do

awesome. or not.

my mother and i had but one musical taste overlap. the beatles. especially the beatles on vinyl.

now, the circle of life is completing itself as elder daughter and elder son develop their musical [it is so hard to type this word] taste. they delight in torturing me with their music. they reset the stations in my car. they add the katy perry station to my pandora. they can't get enough of nicki minaj. maroon 5. one direction.

the only music we both like is the new passion pit album. so now i am biding my time, waiting for their musical tastes to mature. do you think i'll have to wait long? did you like the same music as your parents?

gratitude day 25: casey anne

she left for her first day of junior high today, catching a ride with a friend's mom, my heart shredding in that way that mother's hearts do, over and over. i snapped a hurried photo as her friend waited in the car in our driveway.

me: nervous, crying. her: running, excited, hair curled.

i fell in love with her the moment the nurse laid her in my arms in the hospital. she was beautiful, serene, already wise. today she is calm, obedient, responsible, confident, a peace maker. and totally unafraid of the world.

i am afraid enough for both of us. thinking about her starting junior high, i've had this poem running through my head. it seems to fit her so well.

Song for a Young Girl's Puberty Ceremony

I am on my way running,

I am on my way running,

Looking toward me is the edge of the world,

I am trying to reach it,

The edge of the world does not look far away,

To that I am on my way running.

-Anonymous, Translated by Frances Densmore

gratitude day 19: siblings

readers: please meet all my siblings, from oldest to youngest, left to right [minus my older sister emily, who i left a space for next to me in this photo. i missed her a lot this past week.] me, ryan, anna, angela, steven, daniel, james, lilly

“To the outside world, we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We share private family jokes. We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys. We live outside the touch of time.” ~Clara Ortega

“Children of the same family, the same blood, with the same first associations and habits, have some means of enjoyment in their power, which no subsequent connections can supply...” ~Jane Austen, Mansfield Park

the melzer family just wrapped up a family reunion. 10 days of a house full of noise, commotion, stuff, and people i love best in the world. [20 guests!] it seems so quiet around here—quiet enough for reflection.

and here's what i believe about families, about my family. we chose each other, in a pre-earth life. we were organized and placed in a unit where we could learn and grow best. we were put together because a loving heavenly father knew each of our strengths and weaknesses and knew that together we could do it. together, with each other's help we could become the people we were supposed to be.

to my brothers and sisters: remember summers in idaho picking wild huckleberries? remember trips to lake powell? remember collecting locust skins in jars? remember when we moved to san diego, the beach and having a sand volleyball court in our back yard? remember when we moved to snowflake on friday the 13th? remember when we found out mom was pregnant with lilly? when dad lost his job? when steven went to rehab? when he relapsed? remember when don and i were sealed in the temple? and ryan, and anna and angela? remember when you all drove to utah for a family reunion? i do. and i miss you all already.

since i've been small, i've started out my prayers by saying “i'm thankful for my mom and dad, and my brothers and sisters.” and it's never felt like a vain repetition. and there's a reason i always say it first.

i am so grateful for my family.

i feel like every good thing about me is because of them. every experience i've had with them has shaped me in almost immeasurable ways. when we are together, i feel closer to my true self than with anyone else. i am happy, joyful.

we have shared rooms, vacationed together, ate together, fought together, laughed together, grieved together, prayed together.

and i love them all.

gratitude day 18: A father's love

I found it funny that when I posted a picture of my mother several posts back, some of you mentioned I look like her. I think I got all of my dad's physical genes, and most of his personality genes, too.

I think of these characteristics as the "german genes". I have his teeth [no cavities, yay!], his hair color, his physical build [no calf muscles], and his chin dimple. I once thought that I was as smart as him, but then we played a game of Trivial Pursuit and he put us all to shame. He knew every single answer but one. Every answer!

Also, I have inherited his trait of interrupting. And his debating skills. Sorry friends who have to communicate with me in real life. I am my father's daughter.

Thank you, Dad for being the hardest working man I know. Thank you for teaching me how to drive—that must have been really scary. Thank you for providing for me and trying your best to protect me. I wish I would have listened to you more. You always warned me and then stepped back to let me make my own choices.

Thank you, Dad for teaching me about the power of a father's love. Because of your example of unconditional love, I gained a greater understanding for the love my Heavenly Father has for me. I love you! Happy Father's Day.

gratitude day 16: life

I am grateful to be alive. Are you? Here's a quick snapshot of my life, this week.

1. I am two weeks away from my writer's conference wherein my novel will be critiqued by HOLLY BLACK. [Typing her name, the rhyming phrase "spaz attack" comes to mind. Not a coincidence]. My adult ADD brain is having a hard time focusing on anything else. I WILL finish this round of revisions before then, because I do what I say and I said what I meant.

2. Markus Zusak is now on Twitter. Now we can deepen our imaginary author/celebrity relationship. This brings me an immense amount of joy.

3. I am in love with social media. Pinterest, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook. It feels my social needs while allowing me to stay home, unshowered and barefoot living the dream.

4. I cannot keep up with the laundry. Or rather, I choose not to keep up with the laundry because I am revising my novel. Also, playing Angry Birds.

5. I am teaching a lesson in church this week to a group of women. My self-chosen topic: Lessons From the Garden. Any thoughts, insights?

6. My cousin passed away from a drug overdose last week. His memorial service is today. I cannot stop thinking of the email my mom sent to me and the thought she shared: Life is precious.

Life is precious.

Are you living your dream? Do your loved ones know you love them? Have a beautiful day, friends. You are here, you are alive, and you only get one shot. Make it count.

gratitude day 13: mom

"It is interesting that today, decades later, when life seems particularly overwhelming or frightening or just downright scary, I call Mother and listen for her to say, “Sheri, you can do it.” A mother’s influence not only spans decade, it reaches into the eternities." -Sheri Dew

During my last trip home to Arizona, I was crying because someone didn't like me.* In the midst of my carrying on, mom walked over to me, kissed the top of my head, and said, "Rachel, I love you and know you are wonderful." And just like that I felt okay—like I was three years-old with a scrape on my knee and I needed my mom to kiss it better.

My mom is a calligrapher, water color painter, cook, nurturer, the life of the party.

Matriarch.

I love her. I am so grateful to have her as a mother. How did she survive me?

*It's a long story, in which I acted like I was in junior high and my mother loved me anyway.