Saturday, April 30, 2011

gratitude day 12: cold

in light of the 6 inches of snow we received last night, here are the top ten most awesome things about living in a place that is nose-hair-freezing cold until may.*

10. views at your daughter's soccer game that look suspiciously like a bob ross painting.
9. no worries about the frozen mangos melting in the back of your car on errand day.
8. no need for ice baths—as recommended by timothy ferriss, author of THE FOUR-HOUR BODY**—to lose weight. you're already shivering cold. all the time.
7. playing in the snow when your sister comes to visit for spring break. how many people who went to a florida beach can say they did that? huh?
6. snow heads. see third picture down. i found this on my back deck today, courtesy of lucas.
5. seeing your cute niece, hazel, wearing emma's hand-me-down fleece hoodie.
4. endless cups of hot chocolate. in our case, cocoa mojo.
3. and endless baths.
2. plenty of time to prepare to plant your garden. plenty of time.
1. no need to imagine the norwegian scenery in your novel, or how a girl raised next to a citrus grove would feel about her first winter there.*** all you need to do is step outside. and look at that last picture.

*this entire post might be a lie. it's possible i spent the whole day dreaming of shorts, popsicles, and lounging on a sun-warmed deck, poolside and not being grateful AT ALL for the cold.

**this book is insane. like, seriously bat crap crazy. and offensive. i think a man who writes about his sexual escapades, describing the women involved as sexual experiments and needs clinical drawings to explain how to pleasure a woman, needs more than four hours to find "incredible sex." incredible sex is found through love, commitment, forgiveness, respect, and keeping sacred things sacred. just sayin' tim. you couldn't have missed the mark more.

***this is a bit spoilery for my novel i'm revising, but look at that castle picture again! doesn't that make you want to write a fairy tale? or take a trip to bavaria where your ancestors are from? no? that's just me? oh, okay.


  1. spoilery? Don't worry. WAY more than that will be revealed on the flap of your novel. :D

    Also you should make sure that your publishers, whoever they may eventually be, send you to sign here in Champaign. Just write that into the contract. :D

  2. I love the pictures that go with this post. The snowhead is way cute and so is your niece in Emma's hand-me-down hoody. Good job on trying to post grateful things about the cold. I like the cold too, just not in April/May. :)

  3. You are SO positive. I'm just been complaining over here about it. You are MUCH cooler than me that way.

    And P.S. I told you that 4 hour work out stuff was crazy. I didn't even know he had crazy sex stuff in that book. You still going to soak in the ice bath & get yourself a kettlebell?

  4. Um, I think you write your funniest posts when you are a bit riled up. So tonight I am grateful for the snow that, in my opinion, made this post 110% awesome.

    Funniest picture: the snow face.
    Funniest phrase: bat crap crazy. (I can't repeat that without laughing).

  5. thank you for making me laugh. i loved this post, so much.

    let's go to bavaria!

  6. I think Facebook has spoiled me. I tried to "like" this post... :)